I'm Angry
November 2023
I'm angry. I'm angry at myself for giving. I'm angry at others for always expecting and in some cases demanding. I'm angry at those that take advantage of others. I'm angry at those who feel entitled and walk around treating everyone else like crap. I'm angry at the idiot who managed somehow, to get the position that they got, when they clearly aren't qualified to do the job. I'm angry that the truth isn't spoken. I'm angry that people don't speak up. I'm angry that standards and expectations have dropped and that so many people seem to be okay with it. But most of all, I'm angry at myself that I get angry about all of these little things.
Yet as angry as I may be, I'm going to acknowledge that anger is a normal emotion that needs to be experienced and expressed. It's an emotion that is "triggered by a perceived threat, frustration, injustice, or a sense of being wronged", according to one website. And it has a function... well, four functions that I can think of:
Self-Defense: If anger is triggered by a threat, the emotion serves to get your adrenalin pumping to prepare your body to defend itself from whatever the threat is. (Remember, the mind is all about self-preservation, so if a threat to oneself is detected, the brain sends out signals to prepare you to defend yourself and live to see another day.)
Boundaries: If your anger is a response to something you've seen or heard, and you think you would have (or could have) responded differently, it will either set your own boundaries for when you encounter a similar situation, or it'll help you adjust your boundaries for that situation.
Drive for Change: If you anger is a response to a situation that fuels your opinion on something, it could propel you to take action. For example, if you watch a documentary on a fishing policy and you don't think it's a sustainable solution, you might take action to join a cause to stop what you saw happening, or you might boycott it by not buying the end product.
Assertiveness: Similar to the others, anger might provoke your need to simply verbalise or otherwise express your dissatisfaction with a situation. For instance, if someone lacked basic manners, you might call it out the next time they should have said "please" or "thank you".
Of course, it's also about expressing your anger in a non-destructive or harmful way.
My own little bouts of anger have helped me re-establish my boundaries and provided me with more courage to speak up when I think something isn't right. And it's helped me understand what I find acceptable and not.
It's also taught me the situations that I need to avoid, when I need to walk away, and when I need to stop and take a breath before I do anything else. And I am thankful for that.
Because as frustrating as things might be, allowing myself to experience the emotion of anger, has helped me grow and evolve as a person. It's helped me adjust my boundaries for my own well being and has helped me understand myself better. And for that I am grateful.
I may not be able to change the outside circumstances, but I can control my behaviour and my reaction / response to a situation; Even in the situations where I feel like I can't or won't make a difference if I speak up or directly confront what's angering me, I know that taking a deep calming breath and just walking away, is good for my soul and mental wellbeing.
